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      Handcuffs

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      Blindfold

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      Body chocolate

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      Whipped cream

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      Riding crop

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      Pizza

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      Flowers, so classic.

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      Candy, sweet and simple.

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      Book, personal and thoughtful.

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      DONUT, OBVIOUSLY.

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      Houseplant, they make oxygen.

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      Jewelry, so fancy.

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    1. enhanced-buzz-31404-1422027148-0 New Line Cinema

    2. enhanced-buzz-14836-1421967212-32 Rollins-Joffe Productions

    3. enhanced-buzz-26150-1421967228-0 Touchstone

    1. enhanced-buzz-26166-1421967242-5 Canal+

    2. enhanced-buzz-7539-1422027083-10 Fox Searchlight

    3. enhanced-buzz-16031-1421967289-15 Columbia

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    1. enhanced-buzz-10308-1422027491-4 Revolution Studios

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Which Donut Should You Date This Valentine’s Day?

  1. You got: Clarence the Chocolate-Frosted Donut

    Clarence is a sensitive soul who believes in the art of listening. He’s all about creating a relaxed, low-key environment that will be perfect for an evening of sparkling conversation. By the end of the date you’ll feel so close to Clarence, you might hesitate to eat him. But yeah, you’ll still definitely eat him.

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  2. You got: Wade the Boston Cream Donut

    Wade, just like you, is someone who believes in living simply. He appreciates the beauty in life’s simple pleasures, like pizza and good conversation. Wade is perfectly happy to spend an evening in, watching Netflix, and telling you how special you are. And once he’s done all that, you can eat him.

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  3. You got: Larry the Sugar Donut

    Larry is the outdoorsy type, he believes in the power of sunshine and fresh air. Pack your tent and comfortable shoes, because chances are your Valentine’s Day date will be wild and wonderful. Whether he takes you to the desert to see a meteor shower or to a secluded waterfall for a quick dup, it’s sure to end in magic. Or it will end when you eat him.

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  4. You got: Herbert the Glazed Donut

    Herbert is all about broadening his horizons and discovering new, hip places. Get ready for a Valentine’s Day full of exploring restaurants and bars, trying new dishes, and making friends. Herbert will definitely give you a thrilling ride outside your comfort zone, and in return, you’ll eat him.

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  5. You got: Byron the Jelly Donut

    Byron has an MFA from Berkeley and is a true intellectual. He prides himself on his ability to pick out the perfect wine for any meal, and his extensive knowledge of cinema. Whether you see a movie or take a leisurely stroll in the moonlight, get ready for sparkling conversation. And, of course, also get ready to eat him.

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  6. You got: Lester the Powdered Sugar Donut

    Lester is all about living a life of leisure. Prepare for some true pampering this Valentine’s Day, because Lester will spare no expense. From facials to massages, you’ll both be looking your best by the end of the day, when you eat him.

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  7. You got: Ronald the Chocolate-Dipped Cruller

    Ronald, like you, is a sophisticated individual who enjoys the finer things in life. He would never, say, take you bowling. Ronald will take you to the top of the Eiffel Tower and insist you waltz sensually, he will take you to the top of the Statue of the Liberty’s flaming torch and kiss you passionately. Until, of course, you eat him.

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  8. You got: Melvin the Rainbow Sprinkle Donut

    Melvin is the life of the party, and he’ll give you a Valentine’s Day full of glamour and glitz. From VIP access to table service, an evening out with Melvin is sure to be full of finery and fun. Obviously the most fun part of the night will be eating him.

    5bcb7698516b2ebd64e291edbeb7d907-21 Melvin the Rainbow Sprinkle Donut / Via ThinkStock
  9. You got: Victor the Pink-Frosted Donut

    Victor is all about the thrill of competition. Get ready for him to whisk you off for some Valentine’s Day laser tag or something even more daring! Victor’s a champion logroller, an expert archer, and the king of trivia night. Unfortunately, none of that will save him once you decide to eat him.

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